So this is what I looked like yesterday, on March 24th, 2012, 14.5 months after I gave birth to my second child. To put that into a bit of perspective, I was 5.5 months pregnant with Bode 14.5 months after I gave birth to Dagny. And I STILL weigh more than I did 9 months postpartum from giving birth to Dagny. So in my experience, it was definitely harder to lose the baby weight the second time around. I still cannot fit into certain pairs of jeans that I was wearing when I got pregnant with B. But I CAN fit into my favorite shorts, so I’m a happy camper.
So anyway, I got a makeover at the local Giant Eagle and figured it was therefore a good day to take pictures. It was also the worst day of my period and I “felt fat.” I have to say, I haven’t “felt fat” since I looked over the pictures. In fact, “mental image of me” was way worse that “IRL (in real life, for those of you non-internet types) me.” I think I look pretty good, but strangely I can’t stop thinking about liposuctioning my saddlebags. Which then leads me to thinking about a boob job and a tummy tuck. Sigh. I want smooth, round, melon-y boobs, what can I say? I would love a less shriveled, less wrinkley midsection, but then again a Frankenstein scar that extends hipbone to hipbone is a bit creepy. But let’s not talk about that. Or as Dagny would say, “Let’s not do that.”
What have I done since June 7th, 2011 when the last pictures were taken to assist in losing pregnancy weight gain? Well, I quit yoga about 6 months ago. About 3 months after that James and I joined the YMCA and started going to a 45 minute spin class twice a week. I bought 2 yoga blocks and 1 yoga blanket that have languished in the basement since I excitedly unwrapped them. I moved some hand weights up to the TV console and placed them next to my Bar Method dvds. And every night I hoped and hoped and hoped really hard that I would wake up refreshed and ready to exercise at 6am. I don’t really do much in the weigh (hello, Freudian slip) of “watching what I eat.” But I had several weeks where I was eating a lot of bakery treats. And then several subsequent weeks of planning our family meals to include a lot more fresh fruits, veggies and a lot less…cake and donuts. And this is what I have to show for all of that…
So yeah, did you notice the COMPLETE LACK of boobs. What is very ironic is that pre-pregnancy I was wearing a 34A/B and now I am wearing a 34 C. But they look and feel a lot smaller to me. The skin tone is totally shot beneath both breasts and looks a lot like my tummy. I did not get any new stretch marks on my breasts with the second pregnancy, but they did fall a bit more. All of the real damage was done during the first pregnancy. And I think the best way to describe that damage is with one word, and that word is…deflated.
Anyway, so that’s it. That’s the Grande Finale! As far as I’m concerned, Project Shrinky Dink has come full circle and by that I mean it has come to an end. I hope this has been enlightening for everyone who’s followed this series. It was crazy fun for me, mostly the high I’ve gotten from site views. And a bit creepy considering some of the search terms people used to land on these posts. And if there is an extremely skilled board-certified plastic surgeon out there who wants to sponsor a sequel series, which I like to think of as Free Mommy Makeover, you know, uh, email me?