What. The. Fork. Listen, I am one of those people who scoff at New Year’s Resolutions. I get annoyed that for the first 2 months of every year because I have to deal with parking scarcities when I go to the gym or to yoga. There should be some sort of seniority system for parking at gyms, I tell you! Or in my case, the YMCA. Anyway. Holy crap do I have some things on my mind. Things that could be disguised as resolutions but they’ve been churning in the ol’e noggin for a while now. Several things I’ve recently add to my list. And since it’s “lose weight and eat right” season, I figured I’d air them out here on the blog.
I don’t make any claims that I’m not a complete nut job. But I recently decided I want to see my body in as close to it’s “natural state” as possible before I 1) get really REALLY old and 2) before I die. So I haven’t shaved my legs or underarms in 3 days. Yes, that is what I mean by natural state. Don’t laugh. I smell you dreadlocked, patchouli-wearing, hippie crazies laughing at me! I haven’t decided if I will again let my eyebrows grow out. I mean I’ve already seen them. But it would probably more sincere if I was COMPLETELY natural. Meh they grow fast. I’ll decide once the legs & pits get furry. So yeah, that is one resolution you could say. No, I am not giving up deodorant. I tried that once and once was enough. I’m letting my hair on my head grow out as well and I never really went back to my pre-brazilian habits after it grew out. I’m over stubble. And now I’m always ready to go get one. Just in case the Brazilian Wax Bat-phone rings, you know?
Another long-standing goal of mine is to develop a home yoga practice. And what that means is just to practice the asanas at home, by myself. With a herd of two toddlers galloping around 3 feet above my head. The idea was “neat” when I first started yoga 2.5 years ago. Then I became very serious about wanting to practice at home in September. I still haven’t really done much more than a pose here and there to relieve an ache or pain. My plan is to buy the bare essentials in props and try to force it. Very yogic, right? Lately I’ve had some really poignant spiritual moments that are really pushing me to get past whatever fear is keeping me from doing yoga at home. If I had to guess, fear of failure. But this is my life, there is not much of it left and it’s accelerating from what I can tell. So, I guess I need to just DO IT, for the love of God!
Somewhat related…I would like to eat better. ARRRRRGGGGGGGGGG, the cliche is eating my soul! But this is not your run of the mill resolution to lose weight or inches or whatever. OK, it sort of is. I really want to get to a point where I have emotional eating under control. I’d also like to feel better and have more energy. And I would truly like to treat my body like a temple because I do believe it is the house of my soul for the time being. I think that means I’m going to have to do something about my McDonald’s habit. This is nothing new just because the clock is about to strike midnight on the last day of the year. Ever since Dooce wrote that post confessing she’s on the Paleo diet, I’ve been jealous of her alleged newfound energy. I’ve been fighting the urge to look into it because it’s a goddamned fad diet. Ridiculous fad diet…
Then today I had this idea. What if I did a fast. What I originally thought was a month long fast but underlying reason is just that I want to know what it’s like to be hungry. To understand what needy people go through. Of course I could never truly understand without having a drastic change of circumstance. But when I whine about food and berate myself for eating junk…I don’t know…maybe I would be more motivated to treat my body as a temple if I could experience a small bit of what it’s like not to have that choice. I’ve been feeling incredibly grateful for my life lately. And very aware that I have so much when others have so little.
The rest is mostly a full-on assault of my consumerism “problem.” Which you are somewhat familiar with if you’ve read any number of posts to this blog. My fantasy goal in 2012 is no recreational spending. No retail therapy. NONE. There are…a GAZILLION problems with this one, all of which I have not addressed. But whatever. Right now it’s there floating in my head. I still need to define recreational and decide if I will allow myself to spend gift money. Or which things fall into the category of recreational. To further this goal of no recreational spending I called and almost doubled the electronic withdrawal for our mortgage payment yesterday. Which in turn supports my longstanding goal of paying off this house ASAP so we can drag the kids around the world to various ski resorts in various hemispheres’ winters. So there’s that.
And more along the lines of consumerism I’ve also considered many times over the years trying to only purchase things that “give back.” I think it’s totally possible to only buy stuff in which a portion of it goes to “a good cause.” But then there’s the whole paying extra part of that which drives me nuts. For example, I don’t think Tom’s shoes look like they would last very long and I think they seem expensive for what you get. Granted I have never tried them. And I am in the shameful habit of buying stuff that is made by child slaves somewhere in Asia (by that I mean “cheap.”) I suppose I could just buy stuff that I think is a good value then give the difference in price to a “good cause.” I don’t know. It’s not a solve on the fly while I am typing up a blog post kind of problem . What I DO know is I need some black flats and I need them before this whole recreational spending moratorium kicks in. Because THAT’S the whole point right? O_o
Do you do resolutions? Have you done any of the above and want to offer me advice?
P.S. I will try to post some pictures soon…and next post will be a 2011 family update that I’ll email to all the extended family I have email addresses for.